salty sweet seasons

Is it just me, or is this generation of moms like total babes?! I mean, not even speaking for personal experience muahah – seriously, like everyone in my mom group, or other mamas I see wandering North County are like the modern day barbie with a baby on their hip as the trendiest accessory to hit the market. Who needs a designer handbag when you have a toddler?!

Most have their personal Ken doll and second babies on the way, and I’m over here in my treehouse with Tanner and my two dogs, working on my abs. That being said, as a modern day mama who gets by with a little help from her best friends, here’s my round-up on how to kill it as a single late 20-something mama with a toddler.

{Photo via Pinterest, 2015}

1. if you’re lucky enough to be able to work from home, enroll your munchkin in part-time pre-pre-school. You need a few hours to relax – I mean, go grocery shopping, clean the house, schedule and go to annual appointments, do laundry, fold laundry, put away laundry, then maybe even shower, brush your teeth AND get to shave your legs. Then do your hair….Yeah right, pick on of the above, because that’s all you’re going to have time to do between 9-11:30 before the clock strikes ‘midnight’ and you already have to go pick up your mini me, feeling like you accomplished absolutely nothing.
2. Lean on your best friends and don’t be afraid to ask for help. This is something I struggle with, because I don’t like to ask for favors. But I’ve had to, and am so grateful for all the friends who have helped me when times got tough and I really needed a last minute sitter, shoulder to cry on, ear to listen, or PIC to come out and drink champs with me.
3. Have a baby sitter, and a back-up sitter. You need backup when you get called into work early, have to stay late, need a night out with friends, have to run a baby-free errand, go to a doctor’s appointment, or get that well-deserved mani-pedi once every month, errrrr, more like 3-4 months because #whohastimeforthatanymore.
4. Join a mom group (if you haven’t already). This is equally as valuable for toddler AND mama. Your little monster gets to blow off steam playing with, orrrrr shall I say, hopefully not hitting and biting, the other kids, while you get to gossip, vent, and bond with other mamas going through the same stage of life.
5. If your friends want to set you up, or someone asks you on a date…DO IT. Say yes. Rip off the bandaid. What do you have to lose? I went out with friends for my birthday (for the first time…ever in like three years) and a guy used the line “Can I take you to coffee? What’s the worst that can happen – you get a free cup of coffee and good conversation!” Instead of my gut reaction to kick him in the shins, call him a creep, and run the other way, I thought, whythehellnot and I did it – I met a total stranger for the first time in almost seven years. Don’t worry, I checked in with all my friends letting them know where I was going, his name I creepily stalked from Google, and ensured I was meeting in a public place – during the day. Turns out he wasn’t expecting this little minx to come as a package deal with a toddler, but #byeeeeeee thanks for the cup of tea, and the boost of confidence that being a mom can still mean you’re a total babe and guys still want your number.
6. Find a hobby, or two, and make time for it/them. It can be ANYTHING, and doesn’t have to be something that costs money, since we’re all on a budget. Take a painting class, dive into a new workout regimen, join a co-ed league, pick up a new instrument…….something that fills your heart and soul and makes you feel alive. The only thing more important that being a good mom is being a good YOU. Finding something to make you feel like you is priceless – makes you a better person, a better mother, and a better woman.
7. Hire a financial planner. Whether you’ve always been a single mom, or went through a separation and/or divorce, there’s a lot of financial responsibility that comes along with a child, and it can be overwhelming to try and figure out all on your own. Meeting with a professional can help you get your ducks, I mean, pennies, in a row, and draw a map of what needs to go where and when.
8. Know it’s okay to indulge. Whatever your favorite “cheat” is – find it and stock it. Champs? Chocolate? Make it readily available to access after a long day.
9. Upgrade to have a DVR that tapes to all TVs from one. You’ll never, ever have time to watch any show on time. So record them all, and catch up the one night a week you’re not doing 100 other things from #1’s list. Then insert #8 and put your feet up.
10. Go with the freakinggggg flow, but also have a routine. Kind of a catch-22, but these both save my sanity so much. I have a semi-schedule I try to stick to (breakfast, snack, lunch, nap, snack, dinner), but am never too fussy about when exactly everything has to be. We wake up when we wake up, eat when we eat, and nap when we’re tired. We eat what we can find, and insert as many activities as possible into our day so we don’t have down time aka toddler destruction that makes you lose your mind. Running low on energy and didn’t get to the store today to be Betty Crocker and make a fresh dinner?? Those Chef-Boyardee raviolis you swore you’d never feed your perfectly organically-raised baby will due justttt fine. Add some avocado or peas for some greenage and toss a few blueberries on a plate for some fiber and #BOOM. You just nailed dinner and all the food groups.
11. BONUS – Don’t ever forget you are doing the best.you.can. You’re a beautiful, strong, loving, capable woman whose toddler is SO lucky to have you as a mama. Know when times get tough, the tough get going, and there is always magic in beginnings. No one said it would be easy, but it would be worth it. You’re worth it. 

Are you a single mom or mama who has input? What would you add to this list, and helps you get through the week? Leave a comment below!

{Photo via Pinterest, 2015}